Heretic Homily #1: Resurrection Sunday 2019

Hi there! I’m Constance McEntee, also known as Antinoë Magdalene, and this is a Heretic Homily!

Today is Sunday, 21 April 2019. It is Resurrection Sunday, which is is known in most Christian traditions that I’m aware of as Easter Sunday. I am currently sitting in Saint Mary’s Cemetery in Oakland. Since this is Resurrection Sunday and the grave is a very central part of the story, it seemed fitting that I record this Heretic Homily from a graveyard.

Resurrection Sunday is when we remember Christ rising from the grave and claiming his victory over evil and sin. Christ, of course, being the incarnation of G0D. So, he was both the Father and the Son. There’s a lot of debate there in the various sects of Christianity and I’m not going to go into those. I don’t know nearly enough about it to adequately discuss it, especially not in a short homily like this.

So, how do we know that the tomb was empty, that Christ had risen? Mary Magdalene! That’s how we knew. While the other disciples, the other apostles, were in hiding for fear of being handed over to the authorities the way Jesus was, Mary approached the tomb. She had the courage to approach the tomb and find her Lord was gone. So, we have her to thank for the news. In fact, it was Mary who brought the news to the other disciples and that’s how Peter came to be at the tomb. And that was interesting, isn’t it? Peter, the rock upon which the Church is built, denied Christ three times and he seems to get a better billing than Mary Magdalene. And I’ve got a little bit of a problem with that.

So, how did Christ get to the cross? Well, he was sold to the authorities for 30 pieces of silver. He was sold by Judas Iscariot, who is often considered the Betrayer. And in the stories of the Last Supper, he is warned–the disciples are warned whoever sells Christ will be cursed. Well, since it was necessary for G0D in the form of his own son to be crucified in order to claim the victory over sin, what Judas did was not betray Christ but help him fulfill the Scriptures. You see, it wasn’t Christ who cursed Judas. It was all the humans, all the people who came after and didn’t understand that Judas’ so-called betrayal was necessary for the victory to happen over sin.

Well, why was it necessary for there to be a victory over sin in the first place? For that one it looks like we have to go all the way back to the very first book of the Bible, in Genesis, to the Fall of Humanity, when Adam ate of the fruit of the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. Why did Adam eat of this fruit? Because Eve gave it to him. She said, “We should do this.” Why did Eve do this? Because she was tempted by the Serpent, who actually was Satan–the Adversary–in disguise.

So! If you think about it–and this is why this is called a Heretic Homily–if you think about it, Satan and Judas Iscariot were necessary for the victory of Resurrection Sunday. If it wasn’t for Satan leading to the Fall and Judas leading to the so-called betrayal, we wouldn’t have had the victory. Now, I’m not a sacrificial theologian, and sacrificial theology is very important in a lot of sects of Christianity. That is to say G0D, in the form of his own son, had to be sacrified in order to defeat sin. That’s not my personal thing. I’m more of the victory comes from he stuck to what he believed in–Jesus stuck to what he believed in–even unto the very end. So for me, it’s much more a Universalist than a sacrificial thing. Hey! I’m a heretic! What can I say?

Now, what scholarship do I have to offer in support of any of this? What exegesis have I done on the various stories from the Gospel and the Hebrew Scriptures that I’m touching on? None! This is unverified personal gnosis. In other words, “Because I said so.”

So, Resurrection Sunday. Hail Satan! Thank you for your service. Thank you, Judas Iscariot. And hail Mary Magdalene, blessed among all disciples! And thank you Jesus, for showing that we should stick to what we believe in no matter what.

Ash Wednesday 2019

“What follows has led me to this place where I belong with all erased.”

Today is Wednesday, 6 March 2019. It’s Ash Wednesday, the first day of the liturgical season of Lent. Lent is intended to commemorate the gospel story of Jesus of Nazareth spending 40 days fasting and resisting temptation in the wilderness.

Growing up in the Roman Catholic Church, I learned that Lent was a time when we were supposed give something up. Sundays and Holy Saturday didn’t count, and could have the thing we were denying ourselves on those days. I would try to continue that practice when I joined the United Church of Christ in 1988.

Lately, I’ve been seeing a call to change our Lenten sacrifices. Instead of giving up something we love, I’ve seen calls to give up something that causes harm either to ourselves or others. I’ve also seen calls to take on a new practice to deepen one’s spiritual life.

Today is Ash Wednesday, and I’m completely unprepared for Lent.

Last month at PantheaCon, my spiritual limits were pushed beyond my limits. But, I forced myself to stay as calm as possible due to the work that needed to be done. What was that work? Sending the message that trans people are not only people who deserve their places in Pagan settings, but that we deserve our places among the living as well. That work to an immense toll on me. The recent decision by the voting majority of the United Methodist Church to exclude TBQALG persons from full life in the church did not happen in isolation. Methodists can be found in all places in society, and their church just told them that the Great Commandment and the second half of the Golden Rule can be applied selectively. This, too, will affect people like me because of the fact that Methodists vote, run for and hold public office, can be medical professionals, are hiring managers. Their church has now given them permission to persecute us. And, the Roman Catholic Church has basically said that not only can sexual assault survivors be held responsible for what happened to them, but that Confession must remain inviolate and Confessors don’t have to reveal who among Catholic clergy are predators.

With all these weighing on me, it’s no wonder I haven’t been able to think about what my Lenten practice would be this year. Maybe there are others who are more mentally healthy than I who can endure things like this and still make a commitment. Great! That’s wonderful! I can’t, and I’m done justifying my abilities or lack thereof to others. I’m not as strong as a great many others, and to quote A Clockwork Orange, I offer “no appy polly loggies to thee or thine for that!”

My Lenten practice this year will be to survive. Maybe even to thrive. And with that, I leave you with the following “plainclothes hymn.”

Amen, and Blessed Be.

PantheaCon 2019: Healing the Community

Here’s my take on the four Healing the Community sessions at PantheaCon 2019. Part 1 (Friday) Most of this was talking about what the sessions would be talking about, with the intent that Monday’s session would be when the issues would actually be discussed. While the word “racism” was mentioned, the phrase “trans antagonism” was…

In the Name of the Father

Saturday, 19 January 2019

I’ve often heard criticisms from those who prefer a masculine God that needing a gender-neutral or genderless or gender-inclusive God is unnecessary because of the human traits being projected. Yet, God the Father is fine. Usually, this seems to be due to tradition.

For a great many years, I recoiled at the idea of God the Father. As I thought about the negative responses to a more gender-expansive God, or possibly a God with what would amount to a sexual orientation, I came to understand why a masculine God had bothered me.

For years–decades–I’ve heard my own father explain to me why people like me should be “taken out and shot.” Or hanged, or drowned, or otherwise tortured and killed. True, he worded things ambiguously and might not even have realized he was describing me. But being raised as a son in his house, it was clear that sissies and feminists were bad. His words told me, even if unintentionally, that I was worth less as a person than he and others like him were. Furthermore, I would be educated in schools run by a church where the Fathers would preach about how TBQALG persons were sinful. Why, then, would I think a Divine Father was a good idea?

Then, at age 41, I started my gender transition. My own kids were 20 and 18 at the time. They still call me dad to this day eight years later, and I’m 100% okay with this. I am a woman who is their father.

And so, it’s my experience with being a woman who is a father that I’ve been able to become more comfortable with the idea of God the Father. I cannot separate my experiences as a gendered and sexual being from my religion. If I cannot relate to God on a personal level, how can I have a relationship with God?

Amen, and Blessed be.

In the Name of the Father

Saturday, 19 January 2019

I’ve often heard criticisms from those who prefer a masculine God that needing a gender-neutral or genderless or gender-inclusive God is unnecessary because of the human traits being projected. Yet, God the Father is fine. Usually, this seems to be due to tradition.

For a great many years, I recoiled at the idea of God the Father. As I thought about the negative responses to a more gender-expansive God, or possibly a God with what would amount to a sexual orientation, I came to understand why a masculine God had bothered me.

For years–decades–I’ve heard my own father explain to me why people like me should be “taken out and shot.” Or hanged, or drowned, or otherwise tortured and killed. True, he worded things ambiguously and might not even have realized he was describing me. But being raised as a son in his house, it was clear that sissies and feminists were bad. His words told me, even if unintentionally, that I was worth less as a person than he and others like him were. Furthermore, I would be educated in schools run by a church where the Fathers would preach about how TBQALG persons were sinful. Why, then, would I think a Divine Father was a good idea?

Then, at age 41, I started my gender transition. My own kids were 20 and 18 at the time. They still call me dad to this day eight years later, and I’m 100% okay with this. I am a woman who is their father.

And so, it’s my experience with being a woman who is a father that I’ve been able to become more comfortable with the idea of God the Father. I cannot separate my experiences as a gendered and sexual being from my religion. If I cannot relate to God on a personal level, how can I have a relationship with God?

Amen, and Blessed be.

Broken at Christmas

image

Wednesday, 26 December 2018

Christmas. For the religious celebration, it’s the capstone of Advent, when we celebrate the rebirth of Hope, Joy, Love, and Peace. For the cultural celebration, it’s about being with loved ones, sharing meals, and giving gifts.

And it can be hell on earth for a great many people.

For those of us marginalized for our genders and bodies, it can be anything from hoping the bigoted relatives behave themselves to enduring them saying how great our oppressors are to not having relatives to visit because they’re turned their backs on us completely. These things can aggravate mental illnesses such as depression and anxiety.

It finally happened to me.

What do I, the polytheist Christo-Pagan, do? One relative is an oppressor and is married to another who isn’t. Well, she isn’t an oppressor in that she’s never said anything oppressive to me since I came out. She doesn’t silence or challenge her spouse, though. As I went to bed on the 24th, my depression, anxiety, and psychosis were riding high. The Gifts of Advent–

Hope, Joy, Love, and Peace–seemed far way and untouchable.

I can’t recall the last time I wept on Christmas. I don’t think I ever have in my memory, though my memory is slowing failing.

I’ve long known that Christmas is a time of trauma for many, and I try to be sensitive to that. If I don’t, then I’m failing to bring the Gifts of Advent to those traumatized persons. But now, I have a better appreciation for just how isolating and soul-crushing it can me.

Glory be to Joseph, and to Mary, and to their beloved son Jesus: as they were then, are now, and ever shall be the Holy Family without end. Amen.

Adversarial Advent: Rejoice!

Tuesday, 25 December 2018

Today is Christmas: the culmination of our Advent preparations.

My Advent posts have been, again, rather political. This makes perfect sense, as Christianity is a very political religion. It started that way, and it needs to be. But just because Christianity was intended to be a political religion, it was never intended to be the religion of the Empire. That was Constantine’s doing, not Christ’s, when he made Christianity the official religion of the Empire. This political approach to religion is part of what adversarial theology means for me. I don’t look for easy or mystical answers. There is much strife in the world today, just as there was at the time of the birth of Jesus of Nazareth, the one whom we call the Christ.

How does an adversarial theologian welcome the rebirth of the embodiment Hope, Peace, Joy, and Love? This might be one of the few times when at least part of the answer, to me, seems easy.

We, the Church, are the Body of Christ. Christ is the embodiment Hope, Peace, Joy, and Love. So, we are the reborn embodiments of Hope, Peace, Joy, and Love. That’s the end of the easy part of the answer.

The hard part is actually bringing the Gifts of Advent into the world every of the rest of the year. There will be times when we forget. There will be times when we’re too exhausted—physically, mentally, spiritually. There will be times when we encounter people whom we don’t want to offer these Gifts to. These are all valid responses, as we are human and humans are imperfect. Sometimes, “I will try again tomorrow,” is the best prayer we have to offer.

And ya know what? G!D is okay with that.

Amen, Blessed Be, and Merry Christmas!

image © James C. Lewis (http://www.noire3000studios.com/)

Adversarial Advent: Love

Sunday, 23 December 2018

This is the fourth Sunday in Advent. We’re back to a purple candle and the theme is Love.

I’ve heard a lot of challenge this year from those who are opposed to trans people, BQALG people, women, and people of color about how we aren’t showing the proper Love to our oppressors. That if we really were the so-called “tolerant left” we’d understand that those who hate us and are literally calling for our destruction are human, too. They say to us that they Love us sinners but hate our sins.

Yeah, right.

But, we on the so-called “tolerant left” are full of Love. We are learning to Love ourselves and reject the vitriol that is levied against us. And so, we can love the sinners who are our oppressors while hating their sins of our oppression.

Yeah. I went there.

Amen, and Blessed Be.